TheKey Chronicle

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Monday, June 29, 1998


...Tell them your phone is specially equipped so that when you press the star key, they recieve a 10,000 volt electric shock.


I'm sick of all of this talk of "The Rules". It seems like as long as someone above them in income, postion or both, says "These are the rules." we must obey them because our paycheck depends on it. Why are the rules so damn important, all the time? Do we live in a society where no one questions authority anymore, ever? Why can't we have the power to toss the rules out the window from time to time, as long as no one gets hurt and everyone is to gain? What's the big deal? I guess I'm just tired of everyone blaming their bosses for things that inconvenience, annoy, or otherwise perturb other folks. Like the parking enforcement guy who insisted on giving you that ticket even though you were moving your car, or the landlord who threatened you with eviction because you were 24 hours late with the rent. Give the world a break and break one of your precious rules once in a while. It doesn't have to be a big one and no one even has to know - do it for yourself. You'll feel better, trust me.


If you take a look around the web site, you may notice that I added Link Exchange banners to most of the main sub-pages, but not to the Bitch Page. This is because when I submitted the banner for my main page, it was rejected thanks to the word "bitch". Now, here's how I used it: "Wanna Bitch?" - not "Do you want a bitch?" They assumed that the word being used at all, is enough and they sent me a form email asking that I remove the word. I'm not using it in a derogatory sense as you can tell, it's just one word that means: "to aggresively complain". But of course, Loser Exchange doesn't care about that and since I do care about getting more hits to my site, I did what they asked and censored the banner. Yes, I gave in. I would apologize, but right now, they are a neccesary evil. I need more hits. Maybe someday, I'll not need the imperialist, conservative, wussy bastards any more, but for now, I bend.

[SpinningHead.Com was the former name of ThePete.Com --ThePete]


My friend Becky pointed out to me that once again, NBC is using that idiotic slogan to publicize their summer of reruns: "If you haven't seen it, it's new to you!" In other words, the networks assume that if you didn't see it in the first place, it was obviously your mistake! And since you haven't seen them, check them out now! WOOHOO!! Cuz they're NEW! And that's GOOOOOOD! Now, if you really gave a crap - if ANY of us really gave a steaming crap about these shows, don't they think we WOULD HAVE TUNED IN IN THE FIRST PLACE??? Believe it or NOT NBC, but WE ALL HAVE LIVES THAT DO NOT REVOLVE AROUND THE TV! They revolve around the PC, NOW GET OFF OUR BACKS!!!


And I voted for him! Okay, so Clinton is in China this week to supposedly "strengthen our relationship with China". And part of that has him visiting Tiananmin Square - the site where students were slaughtered by a government who didn't want to let them speak out. Now, I saw an interview with a Chinese Dissident and he claimed that Clinton appearing there would not harm his cause in the least. But I don't care about what Slick Willy's appearance at Tiananmin does to their movement, I care about what his visit there represents to this country - MY country. It says that our country can be pals with a government that slaughters it's dissidents just because some of that government's citizens own companies that provide super-cheap parts and labor for things we, here in America, take for granted. We should have cut off all economic ties with these people long ago, but instead we let our President represent our greed on an international level. Three cheers for the Red, White and Blue.

Monday, June 22, 1998


Los Angeles' MTA is in debt by billions of dollars. This is thanks to the Mass Transit Authority's attempts to give LA a subway system. Now if you ask me, a subway system in LA is completely idiotic (would you want to be on a subway train when an earthquake struck?) and what LA really needs is an above ground 'light rail' train system. But it's all too late for that - billions of dollars have been squandered thanks to mismanagement and corruption. Sinkholes have been all too common over the past few years in this town. I think it was last year when an entire square block of Hollywood Boulevard fell away harming no one physically, but destroying the business of the retailers on that block. Also, more than a few workers have died while working on the Metrorail system. Meanwhile, the slow and meandering bus system, which handles 90% of the MTA's customers, is woefully underfunded. Dig that crazy irony.


Well, my ISP has done it and from what I hear, most Internet Service Providers will be doing the same thing, soon. Killing off their unlimmitted internet access plans. Apparently us power users who like to stay online at all times are few in number and most people who travel the net (according to some ISPs) only spend 150 hours a month online. No, our rates aren't going down, they're staying the same and in some cases going up. You'd think they would go down, seeing as they are limitting the amount of time we're online so tremendously. But, no - you'll still be spending about $20 a month for so much less Access Time. So, basically, the ISPs are just greedy bastards and they want to provide less sevice for more money. Isn't that nice of them?


Well, whether you care or not, Dax, on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine has been written out of the series. Now, I never found this character to be very well developed anyway, so I am not sad in the least to see her go. I am just getting tired of watching characters get killed off, only because the writers have no idea what to do with them. Dukat's daughter was added one season and killed off the next because the writers (who are all men) have no idea how to write teenage girls. Major Kira's boyfriend, the Veddick was killed off because they couldn't make the relationship interesting (probably because the writers don't date much themselves). Why not challenge yourself as a writer? Keep rewriting until you can MAKE the relationship work. Don't give up just because you don't know something about the kind of character you've intorduced into your own show! Gene? Where are ya, man?


Recently, the U.S. Government held hearings regarding the Year 2000 bug. Some 'experts' say that at 12:00am on January 1st, 2000, many computers will suddenly think that it's 1900 because computers track dates by using just the last two digits of the year. What a wonderful government we have that is just now getting around to start chatting about fixing this problem, with a mere 18 months to spare. Then, when they do chat, what do they say? 'Well, we're pretty much screwed. Anybody know what we can do about it?' (Obviously, I'm paraphrasing) WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?? Our government is going to go haywire, our banks will forget how much of our money they have, credit card companies will forget how much we owe... hey, now, I hadn't thought of that! NEVER MIND! I LOVE THE Y2K BUG!

Monday, June 15, 1998


Now, can somebody tell me why the law allows people to switch their long distance phone companies over the phone with OUT written permission from you, the customer? What would stop them from just claiming that you wanted to switch? They could just call up AT&T and say that you want to switch to Bumpass Long Distance and AT&T would let them. The LD company you are signed up for should be required by law to call you and confirm that you want to switch. Because this is NOT law, my best friend was signed up with an LD company with a MUCH higher rate. Luckily, AT&T was cool and took $150 off her bill, but not all companies are that cool.


Hey check it out - Microsoft's good pal Intel (the folks that design the chips in most PCs) are in trouble with the US Government for practically the same reasons as MS. But that's not why I don't like them. After making the immensely popular Pentium chip, they changed it's architecture, making it impossible to upgrade to Pentium II without a special kit - that only Intel makes. Sure sounds like an MS tactic, doesn't it?


Now this is just sad - I have seen dozens of Hollywood films and MOST of them sucked, but the trailers for them, most of the time, made me want to see the movie. Now, the trailers for the X-Files movie make the film look SO good that now I'm worried! I am now expecting to find that the X-Files movie will suck. And what is that stupid subtitle about?? "FIGHT THE FUTURE"???? Isn't the future generally viewed as a positive thing?


WE pay huge rates "just in case" something horrible happens - but what happens when something horrible does happen? WE have to come up with the astronomical deductable regardless of how rough our financial situation happens to be. And if the specific medical, automotive or natural disaster just happens to be something they don't cover, WE are the ones who are screwed. We'd serve ourselves better by not signing up for insurance of any kind and put half our weekly salary away for when the rainy day does come. (Because it will take half our salary to pay for most medical emergencies.)

Monday, June 8, 1998

KEN STARR, I'M CALLING YOU OUT! (Life in General Bitchings for June 8, 1998!)

All right, Ken Starr! GIVE IT UP!! You tried to speed things up by skipping to the Supreme Court, but it didn't work and now you're stuck until October because our wonderful SC has the same schedule as HIGH SCHOOLERS! Instead of taking your time, why not just try the President in the Court of Public Opinion? WHO CARES what the LAW says??? Just show us the evidence you have that says Slick Willy was foolin' around with the Beverly Hills High School Graduate and let US decide!! STOP WASTING OUR TIME!!!!!

COMPUTERS! BAH! (Computer Bitchings for June 8, 1998)

As you can see, I'm back. Which means I have solved my computer problems... For the most part... Well, my Mom always says that she has this aura surrounding her that causes all things electronic to go haywire. I am begining to think that aura is in the genes. I recently bought a brand new IBM Aptiva E-56. For the most part, it rocks. But I STILL can't get the modem to work at anything faster than 26,400 (Yes, it's a 56k flex and yes, so is my ISP) but luckily, no lock-ups! Oh and also my scanner causes my modem to not work. BASTARDS!

US GODZILLA BLOWS NUCLEAR CHUNKS (Media Bitchings for June 8, 1998)

Well, the new "Godzilla" movie has arrived and I am sure by now you have all seen it and if you haven't, you won't. Now, I must admit this piece of dinosaur crap was better than I expected and I can admit I even enjoyed it on some level. But I must say, that was NOT Godzilla in that film. That was a giant T. Rex. It seemed as though Dean Devlin (who you hopefully noticed was made fun of on the animated gif on my main page) and Roland Emmerich (the co-writers and co-producers - Emmerich also directed) has some immature urge to one-up Steven Spielberg's "Jurassic" movies. As a result, the true spirit of the classic Godzilla films was not achieved by any sense at all. IN FACT, compared to an ACTUAL "GOJIRA" film, the movie sucked. I'd suggest you go and see "The Truman Show" instead.

AMERICAN SECRETS (Pete's Main Bitch of the Week for June 8, 1998)

I'm not sure what to believe - I like to think that we Americans aren't smart enough to actually perpetrate a conpiracy on the scale the X-Files suggests. BUT, I just read at that the US used nerve gas to kill American G.I.s that defected during the Vietnam war. This is a new discovery and the fact that this has come out some 20+ years later makes me wonder: What other things do we not know about? I mean, I'm pretty sure the US government is staffed by semi-morons, like the rest of us, but then, how were they able to keep this and the secret radiation tests on innocent civilians (and other sick crap) secret for so long?

UPDATED 7/10/5: This post was written before the nerve-gas story was revealed to be wrong. (If memory servces a couple of CNN reporters got fired for this.) Still, the question I posed is relevant since the other stories were true.